And so it begins!
A new chapter in the life with my oldest grandson, IGF, begins!
It’s his first semester of college, a community college. It’s a good fit for him. Now I have to navigate his school and work schedule. Did I mention that the world looks at him as an adult?
I believe that formatting this next chapter of our lives is important. Timing is priority! It can’t wait until the summer. Thankfully his school is closed the week of Thanksgiving! And just like that there’s a plan. He flies to me in Charleston on the Saturday before Thanksgiving and flies back home on Tuesday before Thanksgiving. And here’s the new thing, I just communicate with him. Society thinks he’s an adult. I am going to have to get use to this. I’m breathing!
Logistics!
IGF is 19 years old. He doesn’t have his drivers license right now. He’s working on it. He lives 1.5 hours from Dulles. And just like that JWF, my youngest son, comes to the rescue! He calls IGF and they arrange an Uber! Did I mention 1.5 hours? I’m breathing!
Have I mentioned my great anxiety about him traversing Dulles by himself? I’m leaning on the memory of teaching him how to do this during Yaya Camps through Chicago, Boston, Dulles, Washington National and San Francisco. He can do this. He can do this. I’m breathing!
I keep reminding myself that the first time is always the hardest, over and over and over again. IGF agrees to text me all along the way and he keeps his promise and just like that he’s here in Charleston with me. Pinch me! The new chapter is happening.
I have two days with IGF.
What does he need?
What does my 19 year old neurodivergent grandson need?
Confidence and encouragement.
It’s that simple!
What experiences can I provide him that will give him confidence?
Bring it on!
Sunday, November 19
We go to a great breakfast place on the Island, KISS. He devours blueberry pancakes. I’m feeling relieved because a hearty breakfast is what’s needed for the first experience.
Wild Blue Ropes
I announce where we’re going and he has the same look on his face from when we rode horses at Gettysburg National Park. I quickly ask him what my job is while he’s with me. He has that look and says, “to keep me safe.” You know the tone of voice.
I remark, “and riding that horse was your favorite thing in Gettysburg.”
So off we go. I’m remembering the horse. His name is Twister.
We arrive at Wild Blue Ropes and get fitted. We went 35 feet up!
Here’s the before and after photos.
Next Stop – Fort Sumter
And then we’re off to Fort Sumter National Park! We went there way back in June 2012. I can still remember remarking to him as we approached Fort Sumter.
“You seem disappointed.”
IGF responds, “I thought it would be larger!”
“Me too IGF! Me too!”
And another Junior Ranger badge is added to his collection.
November 2023 Fort Sumter
It’s different this time! We’re the last boat over. I can feel the difference.
What will the Ranger be like?
What will IGF experience?
What will be different this time?
And just like that we are there and the US flag has to be lowered. Take my breath away!
The ranger is unbelievable with his knowledge of history and did I mention that he’s just inspiring. Lowering of the flag helped!
And then we are on our way back in the Charleston Harbor and I close my eyes and the world seems perfect for a moment.
Monday, November 20
It’s Monday! More history, right? It’s Charleston!
So we’re off to see my favorite historical home, Drayton Hall.
They’ve done a phenomenal job and I want IGF to have this experience.
From their website:
“Drayton Hall Preservation Trust fosters a deeper understanding of colonial America and the evolution of life in the South by discovering, researching, conserving, and interpreting the history, context, and culture of Drayton Hall.”
And here’s the thing! I didn’t take any photos! We were so into our interpreter. She was amazing, the best I’ve had! So here’s a photo from Google Images.
Next Stop– Congaree National Park
It’s the last experience for our time together. We are driving to Congaree National Park to meet my boyfriend. Geez, what should I call him? Boyfriend sounds so High School, so lame! We hike about 3 miles. Walking and talking with guys is good. Right? Better yet is that a college professor is talking with a college freshman and I get to listen. We move on to pizza in Columbia, SC. I’m like a guest at dinner. Pure JOY for me listening to the professor and my grandson for more than 2 hours.
IGF and I get in the car to return to Charleston and IGF EXCLAIMS,” that was interesting.” Me, “In a good way?”
IGF, “Oh yes! “
Me, “Good!”
And he’s asleep within 20 minutes and it’s a 2.5 hour drive home. No worries! I’ve got this!
Reflections from the Island Cottage
The Ropes course was critical. This had to be the first experience.
At one point IGF puts one foot out onto a single wire and quickly takes his foot back and exclaims, “I’m not doing that!”
I take a deep breathe and ask quietly, “what can you do?”
IGF looks around and finds an alternative path. Sort of like life.
And off he goes confidently!
I’m silent and hoping that confidence is sinking in to each cell of his body!
I’m learning that silence is a good thing.
Reflections from the Professor
He’s insightful and ethical.
He’s current with US and foreign policies for a 19 year old.
He’s open to ideas.
He came alive when we got to talking about politics.
I’ll give him an A+! Right?
The Sweet Spot
Where’s The Sweet Spot?
Let me give you some information first before I get to the sweet spot!
He’s majoring in recreation and wellness!
I asked him what he wanted to do with it and without missing a beat he responds, “I am going to be a Park Ranger.” So it’s for real! I’m breathing and remembering ALL the Junior Ranger badges he earned at all the Yaya Camps. Somewhere around 12?
He spoke with the Park Ranger at Congaree National Park. She was young and let’s be honest I think that her nose ring helped to give her credibility. She shared what her major was (the same thing from Clemson) and what was needed on a resume. She was quick to emphasize that Park Ranger resumes are different. I just quietly stepped back and listened. He’s got this!
So where’s the sweet spot?
The sweet spot is he’s growing up!
He’s an amazing and kind human being that I get to call my oldest grandson.
He’s got this! I am thrilled to be a part of his life.
And all is perfect with the world for this moment.
Living In the Sweet Spot 